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Tuesday, January 03, 2006

Above the law, but not reproach

The great thing about being a clogger is that you can reap all the benefits of having a high-profile, widely-read and (sometimes) informative and engaging web presence for your brand but are not forced to comply with any of those awfully boring rules or 'laws'.

Like corporate conduct policies, or libel. Yawn.

This has been extremely well demonstrated recently by Yahoo! clogmeister Jeremy Zawoddernodderny and king of Kalido bling Andy Hayler.

Exhibit A: Zawodny flames Dell in four-letter rant

Dell mucks up delivery of a monitor, then screws up telephone support. Zawodny sails close to the wind with his critique of the India-based helpdesk but just about gets away with it. He's not a happy man, and manages to slag off Michael Dell's sweet but struggling baby through an epic rant and one headline-based f-word. Charming. VERDICT: Curb your language, Jezza.

Exhibit B: Hayler strikes a blow to East-West relations

The rising dragon of Chinese commerce is good. Hayler responds with a wildly racist headline about the supposed colour of all Chinese people. The result is terrifying. The man clearly has no clue what he's done. What would happen if the next economic resurgence was in Uganda? The mind boggles. VERDICT: Take a holiday (preferably to Beijing).

In order to redress the balance, I'm going to give 'em some back. And I can, because I'm a blogger. Plus I have the added bonus that I'm not trying to reflect any brand values or corporate image. Yay!

Here goes:

On behalf of Dell: Yahoo!'s products are a pile of crap. In fact, as far as I can tell, Yahoo! doesn't have any products. Yahoo! bought flickr because weak search and rubbish email wasn't enough to keep it afloat.

On behalf of all Chinese people: I'd like to point out that Andy Hayler's head looks like one of those optical illusions that changes expression when held upside down.

Balance restored.

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